The two shall become one.

To the best of my knowledge I can not remember experiencing the two apart from one another.  Not sure why or what divine being decided that they should be experienced together or even what evolutionary process has its hand in it, but pain and anger seem to be on in the same.  Not that they are the same but they have become, in my experience, inseparable in experience.  Not physical pain, that too, but emotional pain bears with it the fury of anger.  The feeling of being wronged immediately followed by the burning desire to give that pain back.  To make sure that person gets, not only what they gave you, but ten fold what they deserve for their injustice.

I know what this is like, to burn with anger.  To be so consumed by it that it makes you insane.  Reason is driven out like a distant memory and the only thing you can think of is giving the pain away.  With such urgency as if it were thousands of bugs crawling on your skin or a bag around your head taking the life out of you.  So to your folly you give it back.  You project your anger onto someone or something else.  But little did you know that only shame and guilt would lye on the other side.  You realize this does not make the pain go away and the shame and guilt begin to well up inside you and begin to boil and you begin to get angry once more.  But this time there is nowhere to go because you have tried giving it back and it only makes it worse.  So you just let it burn inside of you.  It builds and builds till it runs over in a thousand different ways that you never knew.  It begins to corrode your soul away like rust in a pipe.  You think its okay because the end is plugged but you don't see it running out of the old wounds that have just begun to break the surface.  Until you feel it draining you away.  Your life changing to death.  Next thing you know your angry all the time and you don't know why.  Maybe not visibly but its always there, the pain and the anger, holding you captive.

There are times you experience the healing touch of a person or an idea that binds up the wounds and gives you life back again.  Revealing that there are more powerful things than pain.  But how unfortunate it is for us that we see so little of this.  Perhaps somewhere, at some time, we missed our calling.  We missed our ordination to be the healing hands of God to each other.  To speak a kind word, to forgive, to provide, to love.  Perhaps some day, we will see find our way again.  Perhaps we will not then be afraid to put our hands in the dirt so we can bring a healing touch to someone who so desperately needs it.